Saturday, December 22, 2012
I've been thinking more and more about one of my favorite poems. I posted it once before but wanted to share it again as it represents much of my thought process of 2012 Enjoy. Much love!! http://www.inspirationpeak.com/poetry/theinvitation.html
Friday, December 14, 2012
Holidays are here. Month of December already half through. This year, my ex has the kids, for Christmas. First year experiencing the alternating holidays, first year for a lot of things. I had dinner with a friend the other night. I told her that, "I BELIEVE that my life has amazing things in store. I'm evolving, making up for years of stagnation". I feel that I'm living. Really living. Each day is different and special. My practice is deepening. I feel my body opening again. Deeper backbends. More focus. My teaching is coming along. I look forward to teaching in Ashland Oregon next month. One of my favorite places. Shakespeare, good food, nature... All the Best.. Happy holidays. 2013 - bring it!
Saturday, December 8, 2012
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Karma Yoga: "The word karma is derived from the Sanskrit kri, meaning 'to do'. In its most basic sense karma simply means action, and yoga translates to union. Thus karma yoga literally translates to the path of union through action. Karma yoga is described as a way of acting, thinking and willing by which one orients oneself toward realization by acting in accordance with one's duty (dharma) without consideration of personal self-centered desires, likes or dislikes. One acts without being attached to the fruits of one's deeds". I have been the beneficiary of "karma yoga" here in Salt Lake City, Utah. I traveled to SLC to visit Rahn Miralles, a student who graduated with me at TT. I told Rahn that I was having difficulty starting to teach. Rahn has been a teaching powerhouse since leaving Training. Rahn has his own special story, but imagine, he has lost over 200 pounds so far after starting BHY. Yoga has saved his life, I'm sure. Teaching wise, Rahn taught 22 classes in one week! He's well over 200 or 300 total? Me, I'm at 8. I can't express the gratitude I have for the SLC Bikram community! So increadibly welcoming, so supportive, so yogi. The students here are A-mazing. Really. These yogis rock. I've been teaching classes daily with 40+ students. So beautiful. So powerful. So Salt Lake!!!
Thursday, November 22, 2012
Thursday, November 15, 2012
Saturday, November 10, 2012
It always makes me smile when I see that yogis have read about my journey from all over the world. Russia, Germany, Canada, United Kingdom, Netherlands, Latvia, Turkey, Pakistan.... And so on. Part of my desire in putting out a "raw" telling of my story was to help others feel not so alone. Maybe give someone courage to face a change or challenge in their own life. Be it someone living in America or Egypt. People are people and we all live only one life. There's no changing that. You are born into a place and begin a journey. Life's journey of learning, adapting, changing, loving. Just being. I try to be my best self. Yoga has changed me and has opened up my heart and soul in ways that I'm left awestruck. I don't recognize my life anymore before starting yoga. It was the key to inner self realization and is now my touchstone. I hope that your practice is equally rewarding. It's a sacred act. Make sure your own 90 minutes in the hot room is just that. You're own time to peel back the layers of you. Be amazed by what you find and keep going...
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
Friday, October 26, 2012
I'm in Portland, Oregon. Spent the night with my brother Chris best friend Tim and his wife Alex. Portland just has vibe about it that says "I'm sexy and I know it" without trying. Like it here. I'm on my way to Seattle to visit my sister and friends. Last night I talked about the events leading to my divorce because Tim and Alex really wanted to understand. I told them how I felt the day I left for TT. My car was packed and I was LA bound. I told them that as soon as I drove out of my driveway I knew that I never wanted to come back. And I never did. The farther away I got, the more free I felt and that feeling has never left me. The house represented a lot of sadness, loneliness, heart ache, confusion and isolation. I didn't leave the people in the house behind. I still have an amazing bond of love with my children, who I cherish. My ex-husband and I didn't have any sort of bond that meant anything. I guess a bond of friendship. Lots of isolation however felt by each of us. Alex recalled how as a child she grew up in a loveless marraige. As a adult, she felt very confused about marraige and relationships. Her sister is not married at 38. Her passion about living a life that represents YOU was beautiful. She and her husband are committed to this pursuit. Anyway, enough looking back. I taught my third class yesterday. It was great. Really great. Happy
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
Thursday, October 18, 2012
At my new favorite hide away, Sol Bakery, on Hill Road in Boise, Idaho. In the loft so I can smell the sweet and savory productions being made by hand downstairs and spy on customers coming in. There's a massage therapist arriving shortly to provide free chair massages. (just told) So, pretty much found my nirvana for the moment. Then off to take Julie Grants FIRST YOGA CLASS today at noon. I went to TT with Julie. We were both battling it out to be the "offical LAST teacher to teach". So, we both struggled a lot with the dialoge, who the hell cares... It is what it is and I guess that's what it is, isn't it? So, I had a bunch of funny things to share but I think for another day. Feeling good, happy. Getting OUT of my head. Someone said at TT, to get OUT of our heads because it's a bad neighborhood. Couldn't agree more....
Friday, October 12, 2012
Monday, September 24, 2012
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
I've been practicing Bikram yoga for a little over four years now. During that four year time frame, I have been a "stay at home mom". I worked for a couple Pharmaceutical companies, Abbot Labs and Novartis, in sales before that. I bring this up because I haven't really been out in the "working world" since starting my practice. This past weekend was the first time I was in a leadership role, had 30 people reporting to me over the Festival weekend. The festival was put together, last minute, fast and furious by a wonderful person, Mary Hurja. I met Mary, by chance, (if you believe in chance, I don't) three weeks before the festival. She planned a massive festival and needed a lot of help. The reason I bring this up is because I'm often asked how yoga has effected my life. Changes that I have experienced from the way my mind or body felt before Bikram. This last weekend really gave me some concrete data to help answer that question. I felt that I was "in the zone" all weekend, in terms of performance. I haven't had people directly report to me before, but I found that it was seamless and the answers to multiple problems, "situations", or just making decisions came very naturally to me. People responded extremely well and soon staff that I didn't have any responsibilities for started asking me for answers as well. I can bring this back to yoga. I had one woman who was involved with the festival from the beginning tell me, multiple times, that I was so calm and collected and organized throughout. She couldn't believe it. In the mist of a shit storm, I was calm and dealt with multiple issues at once, with nearly perfect outcomes. That is yoga. Bikram yoga calms the mind, teaches you how to breath again, and understand yourself better. I was told after the festival ended that I'm a natural leader. That meant a lot to me, because prior to starting yoga, nobody would have said that to me. So, people.... do your yoga!!! It's hard, but you will see so many positive changes!
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
Food and Wine festival time, also known as The Sunnyslope Food and Wine Festival, but will go down as Festival ala Turkmenistan because I'll be working my backside off. I expect 8 AM til 1 AM Friday and Saturday, Sunday only 10AM till 8PM. It's going to be crazy fun. I'm going to hide a flask in my pocket throughout. Have a permanently confused and glazed over look on my face. No, not really, I can handle it. I can handle just about anything that comes my way now. I feel a sense of empowerment. It's pretty damn cool. Yesterday I signed my divorce papers. Today I navigate in a new direction, my own direction, into my own future. Can you start over at 40? You're damn straight you can. And it feels pretty good.....
Monday, September 10, 2012
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
Monday, September 3, 2012
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
Tonight I'm going to see Michael Franti and Spearhead. Looking forward to a fun night out with friends. My daughter, Stella, started third grade this week. She's a sweetheart. Stella is so happy school is back in action. She just watched "We bought a Zoo" for the first time a few days back. She kept playing the end of the movie over and over again. Really liked it. About how the Dad met the Mom. The Dad basically walks by a cafe window and sees the Mom sitting inside. He decides that he can use 20 seconds of courage to go in and talk to her. He says to her, "why would you, the most beautiful woman I have ever seen, ever want to talk to a guy like me?" and she says "Why not?" and smiles. End of movie. Stella loves it and has been saying "Why Not" to a lot of things now. It's cute. Why not, exactly. Yoga has been good. My body aches on the right side. I do sooo much yoga but I'm still stiff at the beginning of every class. You would think that the muscle fibers would just give up after a while and stay loose. Not a chance. I'm planning to stay in town for Labor Day week and practice dialoge like a crazy woman. My "interview" class is Sept 8th. Yoga, Yoga, Yoga Why not???
Thursday, August 23, 2012
Last night was the "Focus on Children" required workshop in the state of Idaho for formal divorce or separation. Imagine, going to the courthouse along with about 40 other "soon to be divorced" citizens. All sitting together in the same room. Ackward. Strange beyond belief. Many came with their spouse. I did. I kept looking around the room at peoples nonverbals. It made me feel sad, so I stopped. The class was actually pretty good. I like that they incorporated a lot of clinical data and gave advise/information based on results of scientific studies. Outcomes where they saw a benefit to children. One of the most important things the grief counselor said was that male children have a 350% higher chance of becoming involved in drugs, alcohol and the law if they are repeatedly exposed to parental conflict. (meaning fighting) This was the same statistic for divorced parents and intact parents. (250% for females) We didn't fight, really ever, in our ten year marriage. I think we should have more, in a healthy way, but that's the past. (and I promised JT that I will refrain from mentioning him directly in my blog) Stella attended the kid portion of the workshop, separate from us. She said she liked it. Liked talking to the kids, ate 6 pieces of pizza and made a bracelet. She seemed good. Enough of that. Yoga update: I scheduled my "interview class" with Jamie. Sept. 8th. Looking forward to it. I'm ready. Toes on the line.
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
Tuesday, August 21, 2012
Saturday, August 18, 2012
So I deleted my last two blog submissions. Poor judgement on my end? I'm like the queen of bad judgement. Some people have said to not put my personal thoughts out in the vernacular because it will come back to haunt me later. I think that is true, but I'm going to haunt myself if I don't. This is my therapy. My way of getting things out of my system. Some people may be concerned but seriously, if you have been reading my blog, then you know that I have a very sarcastic, tongue in cheek, sense of humor. I don't feel or act like most people. My brother Gabe said it pretty well one day, a couple years back, after some type of debauckle I was in, "Naomi say what we all think". Becoming a yoga instructor has been a dream of mine for some time. What happens in the yoga studio is a very personal thing. What people feel on the mat is their own. They make it happen for themselves. The yoga teacher, heat, room,studio and the asanas are just a medium to make that mind/body connection happen. It doesn't matter who the teacher is. It doesn't matter what the room looks like. It doesn't matter what color your fancy yoga mat is or that your wearing the latest super cool Onsie hotpants. (but you look good) What does matter is the consistency, dedication, openess and willingness to try. Try a little harder, go a little deeper each time. That is what makes the difference in someones life. I hope that everyones practice is evolving. That is what I hope for most. Because when that happens the world changes, for the better, in a small way that can have a big impact. Today is my birthday. Birthday 41. Also my daughter Hollys birthday too Birthday 4. It's a beautiful thing. She's such a sweetie. Stella, my other daughter turned 8 yesterday. Lots of birthdays. Lots to celebrate. My goal for year number 41 is 1. Starting teaching in Boise. 2. Travel to France during the summer (again) 3. Teach BHY in Nice, France 4. Show Stella Paris 5. Teach kids yoga at Womens and Childrens Alliance (local womens shelter) 6. Spend time with people I love and love me. 7. Keep writing throughout
Tuesday, August 14, 2012
I wonder what Lennys* is up to these days. Good ole Lenny. I only knew him for a few minutes but I miss him. Hmmmm.... So I have a birthday coming up. I turned 40 last year. My goal was to attend Bikram Teacher Training. Check that box. My goal for year number 41 is to actually START teaching here in Boise. It's been a rough couple month, but now that the dust is settling, time to get on with it. I teach a practice class to a couple students and teacher tomorrow. We'll see how much Bikram College of India, dialoge from HELL(Turkmenistan**) I can recall. Just relax, breath. Go and touch the mirror. TOUCH IT!!! I miss training. They (the staff and visiting teachers) said that we would. They were right. I miss sitting in the back of the class listening/laughing/sleeping. I miss the energy in the yoga room. I miss practicing yoga with 450 other dedicated yogis. Miss that a lot. Snap back to reality... the weather here in Boise has been brutally hot. Triple digits nearly everyday since I have returned. I never stop sweating, ever. I have used my sweat glands so much in my 40 years that I can say now I no longer smell. "Can you believe it"?(sorry, Bikram quote - had to do it) It's true. Well, 90% of the time. The other 10% I swear to god that I smell like a horse. *Lenny - Dog/Guru. See previous posts ** you know who you are
Top 3% in America to bottom 3% in the same America. It didn't take long either. 3000 Square foot home in the Burbs to 300 square foot apartment in the "city". Hmmmm. This is what it must feel like to reside in NYC. A NYC walkup, no doubt. Seriously, I'm thinking about using my oven for extra shoe space. Crazy times. My apartment isn't exactly 300 SQ FT, I would say the entire place is the size of my previous master bedroom including bath/closet area. So that means I just shoved a kitchen/living room/dining room and hallway into my old bedroom size-wise. Getting creative with space is something I can do apparently. Succeed in a marriage between a man and woman, not so much. I left all my furniture behind, home behind, husband behind. I'm retaining my two beautiful children (50/50 custody)and my dog Piccolo. Start please.... Looking at my life now is a complete trip. I don't like drugs, but I kind of feel like I'm living in a psychadelic drug like state. Not sure where reality starts or stops. Reality. Getting real? What was "real"? Was my life before TT real? Was it a big fucked up mess? Who really knows. What I do know is that I like Carl Jung. I like him a lot. That guy had a interesting view on life and human behavior. Pretty radical, pretty cool. I bet he did yoga. Hot yoga, no doubt.
Its been a few months since graduating from Bikram TT. A few months and a life unraveled. I'm waiting to enroll in the "Adjusting To Life After BTT 101" class. Pretty sure it doesn't exsist. I'm living it. Life after TT has been exhilarating, fast paced, increadibly slow, confusing, depressing, happy, sad... all the emotions a human being can feel. I guess the fact alone that I have felt so many emotions is important. Life evolving, life changing... Since graduating from TT in Los Angeles, I stayed in the "City of Angeles" as long as possible. My extended family had to eventually do a intervention in order to get me back to Boise, Idaho. I sensed something was up that day. I started getting messages about meeting for dinner, and another about what time I would be back and another about dinner again. When I arrived earlier than expected, I saw my Mother and Sister in Law sitting at the table, deep in conversation which immediately stopped as soon as they saw me. You know that nervous energy people emit? Well, they had it oozing out of every pore. They jumped up and started cleaning or something. I was so emotionally drained at that time that I decided not to think too much about it. Little did I know that my entire family had been on a conference call earlier that day discussing everything Naomi. The good, bad and the ugly. I think it was mainly about the ugly. Anyway, long story short, I started driving back to Boise the next day. Mother in tow. Back to my life, fillled with dread and apprehension. I was returning to a life that I felt didn't reflect me at all. I knew that before I left for TT, I knew it years ago. Time to face the music. In more ways than you can imagine. My blog going forward is my way of understanding my life through writing. Read if you like, it's not going to be pretty but I promise that it won't be boring. It will hopefully be funny. When given a chance to laugh or cry, I choose to laugh. It's the same emotion more or less just different.
Friday, June 8, 2012
Yes - you figured it out for sure. Kareem Abdul Jabbar was at our training last night. When I saw that man step through the door, I just about started screaming. He is a legend and I've never been in the same room with him before. Literally larger than life, but has such a warm, relaxed presence And he does Bikram Hot Yoga! He sought out Bikram while he was still playing basketball. His game had degenerated to the point that he was near retirement. He came to Bikram and they worked together, using yoga to heal his body, and he was able to play another eight years as a result. There's some qualitative evidence that this yoga works. It's often referred to as a "healing yoga". And it is. Healing physical/muscular ailments, but its a whole body/mind/spirit that is healed by doing Bikram Hot Yoga. It's so challenging, that it forces you to go inside and find our source of inner strength. It's not about a bunch of naked masocistic exercise freaks who like to stare at their bodies in the mirror for 90 minutes. (maybe a few of those mixed in) It's so the complete opposite of that. If you haven't been to a Bikram class, please google it and attend a class. Please do it for me. :) Even if you hate it (and many people do) at least try it.
Last night, our 5 PM yoga class started out pretty normal. Bikram was teaching. His BIG orange chair set up for him. Hot tea next to him, small bowl of Wearther Original candies, water, air conditioning system over his head, cute little leapard pillow. But he's not spoiled at all, right???? He was in a really good mood. Super funny, not being quite a mean to the people he "calls out" for doing postures incorrectly. I swear the woman he corrects is always wear blue... "MISS BLUE... MISS BLUE... WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHY YOU DO IT THAT WAY? ARE YOU CHICKEN SHIT?" always someone in blue. (note to self, stop wearing blue in the hot room) Anyway, the class lasted 2 hours. He mentioned that he had a guest coming who needed to see a couple postures for a grant at a university. So after a 2 hour class we had to do 4 more postures, to show off for him. Before we started the extra postures, I saw the back door open and a enourage enter. Amoung them was someone I recognized straight away. Who is the NBA's all time leading scorer, with 38,387 total points? He was a Center and is regarded as one of the best basketball players OF ALL TIME. He is known for his signature move called the "sky hook". Do you know? I have to go to class now, but will answer the question later.....
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Big shout out and crazy props to my big brother Chris for coming to teacher training last night !!! It was Chris's very FIRST Bikram hot yoga class evvvver. What a way to start with 450 other yogis cheering you on!! So special. Chris did a fantastic job! Made it through the whole class. Attempting all the 26 postures. (especially savasana) I'm so proud of you!!!! One of the best parts was Chris just looking around before class started, watching all the yogis. We are a pretty bad ass group of people and the collective energy in the hot room is palpable. It's like one big hot yoga half naked sweaty party. Then you kill yourself and start silently swearing as class progresses. The other day during a realllly hot class I just said outloud for all to hear " OK... I'M DONE. I want to go home now. I'm driving back to Idaho now bye bye". Then you get through the class and feel once again that if you can do this, you can pretty much do anything .....
Wednesday, June 6, 2012
Wednesday morning. Slept great last night!! Woke up once in a pool of sweat. Why do I have to sweat 24/7 here? I guess my body is still self regulating. Anyway, I feel awesome. I know we are on the home stretch here. I have a sense of calm most of the time. So grateful to be here and have had a chance to put my body, mind and spirit through a renewal experience. I would like to tell everyone reading my blog to please consider coming to Teacher Training. Even if you have no desire to actually teach one class. It's surprisingly secondary to the main event here at Yoga Camp. The real "main event" is YOU. Bikram has a saying "born a baby, die a baby". What he means is that most people never figure out what they are all about from the day they are brought into this crazy world until the day they exit. That's not a life. Find out, ask the question, look for a new answer. Do some yoga. Get to know the most important person in your life. YOU.
It's midnight and we just started a movie. Right before starting Bikram said that "because he is so nice, IF we want to leave, it's ok. BUT he also said for those who do leave we can "eat shit and die". So, I guess I'm in the "eat shit and die" group. Happy to in the room. Can't sleep quite yet. Today we had two yoga classes. Both were good. Heat not too flesh melting high and I felt strong. I believe we are on class number 80 since arriving at Teacher Training. I would like to continue doing doubles when I get back home. It feels really good. First class at 8:30am is like the "warm up" and second at 5pm seems like the "real class". Tonight we had a lecture by Bikram's brother, who is a OB-GYN. Is a professor at UCLA. It was interesting but I'm not sure what the reproduction system has to do with yoga. People (all women) were asking questions about their bodies. I fell asleep once. Heard a question about Human Papilloma Virus and woke up again. More questions on HPV... and more... Hmmmmm? Well, better get some sleep. All is well in Yogaland. My Mom came to visit last night. It was soooo nice to see her and catch up. Love Moms! Your the BEST!
Monday, June 4, 2012
Sunday, June 3, 2012
Sunday and one yoga class down. One to go. Then off to celebrate a birthday. French guy (who I have made it clear to that I'm going to be staying at his flat in France very soon), so you know it will be a interesting night. Looking forward to it. Especially since it feels like we havent really had much of a weekend here. I did get out for breakfast recently. Went to a place on Abbott Kinney that I love. I think it's called Three Squares? Anyway, they have fantastic food. Being served food is now a luxury. Simple pleasures as having someone deliever a cup of coffee to you while you sit down at a table has become so rewarding. Then when the food comes, you just feel like a million dollars. So simple, but so beautiful. I think I wanted to give our server a big hug and kiss after the meal. Being in the yoga room so much just makes you want to connect with people. So, I did have a break-through moment during this same meal. I had finished eating, just kind of hanging out looking at people. Families passing by, couples holding hands, random homeless person, hippies with surfboards, skateboarders listening to music... I started to look at the table next to me and noticed that the small dog on the womens lap was really well behaved and really didn't move the entire meal. THEN... the dog did something amazing. There was a piece of bacon on the table by the womans coffee cup, on the saucer underneath to be exact. I watched the dog slowly, very very slowly inch forward toward the bacon. He was then touching the bacon with his nose, I guess taking a big sniff, then the dog puts the bacon in it's mouth. AND THEN... he put it back and went back to his curled up position on the womans lap. I watched all this over about a 2 minute timeframe, but I think my life changed. I said that I think I have just witnessed the most powerful display of willpower by any animal or human. After sharing what I had just seen, someone said, "that dog could be your Guru"!!! And you know what, no disrespect to Bikram but seriously the dog blew my mind. His name is Lenny and he is a rescue dog. Was treated very poorly in the past. You could tell that he has a wonderful life now. I watched him trott off with his owners and it really looked like he was so happy that his paws barely touched the ground. Lenny the Dog. My new Guru.
Saturday, June 2, 2012
OK this is hilarious. I just woke up, it's 6AM. So, firstly, I'm happy that the clock didn't read 3:30 AM and I slept through the night. Secondly, Sharon my Aussie roommate just informed me that last night, while I was dead asleep I was snoring and saying the dialoge!! REALLY! Are you serious. I DONT SNORE and I DONT KNOW THIS FUCKING DIALOGE! But she swears that I was and tried to get me to shut up and then I started to just mimick whatever she said!! Wow, this is proof that I have lost my mind. Finally some tangable, indisputable truth. Sharon also said that I was rehearsing "Tree Pose" and said it perfectly word by word. I guess my brain is playing tricks on me because during posture clinics I struggle to get the words out. So freaking wierd. So, we both had a good laugh about it. Today we have two make up classes. Starting at 7:30 AM I hope you all think about me while your having a relaxing fun weekend. I'll be drenched in sweat once again. But it's cool, it really is. I'm good with it. It's why I'm here and I don't quite have a six pack yet so bring it!! Last night, I re-read all the cards that my beautiful female friends back home gave me before I left. They are filled with words of encouragement, hope and joy. I felt so loved, so very loved. Thank you again for being there for me. You all know who you are... I love you!!!
Friday, June 1, 2012
Heat, no heat.... Heat, no heat..... So we think we have a 7:30 PM class tonight, after no classes since Tuesday. I did go to a awesome BHY class at the brand new Marina Del Ray Bikram studio at 5:30 AM today. The studio is beautiful. I met the owner and hope to teach there sometime in the future. I come back to Los Angeles about twice or three times a year. 5:30 AM is the earliest I've EVER taken class. I think I got in a full day of activities before noon. This afternoon we had a lecture from Dr. Dilip Sarkar. It was about East meeting West medical science intervention lecture. Very good, I think the best I have heard to date here at TT. Dr. Sarkar said that it's only a matter of time now before yoga therapy will be integrated into how the West treats chronic diseases and disease management. I know it's coming. This is in my wheelhouse and I can't tell you how many physicians have told me over the years if only their patients would go for a walk OR do some yoga, they would be so much better off than just visiting their doc when something comes up. If people got intune with their own bodies, I think the USA's GDP would jump off the charts. So many things would change because the people would change. The Cleveland Clinic offers 10 yoga classes per day for their employees and has a new position called Chief Wellness Officer at the clinic. On thing that Dr. Sarkar said brillantly is that a genetic predispostion is something that you can't get around, as a person. Or other words, if your mother gets heart disease you have a genetic predispostion to also develop heart disease. This is a fact. However, if you change your behaviour than that of your mother, in particular start doing a regular yoga practice, then you achieve genetic suppression of this high risk genetic predispostion. That kind of sums up what the physicians were telling me all along. Do something different for your body, mind and spirit and you will take a different path.
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Week Seven. Dialoge done. Completed posture 26 in class today. Whewwww Check that off the list. Now, lots of lectures and some hot yoga sessions. But wait, we can't do yoga because our big yoga ballroom was shut down by the Los Angeles Fire Department. Yes, it is true. I guess it wasn't to code on some electical issues and we have not had yoga for two days now. Most people would think that a reprive from two sessions of 90 minutes of torchure would be nice. No not this crowd. If they don't get the problem fixed quickly they are heading for a massive yoga meltdown of a epic level. I said to my roommate tonight they if they don't get the damn room heated up, I might just need to take up Vinyasa Flow. So, people are freaking out a bit about that. Scrambling to Manhattan Beach studio or Headquarters to get their "Yoga Fix". When you're used to a certain routine, it's a bit difficult to change. Remember Jake from Shawshank Redeption? He never made it on the outside. Similair situation here. We might have some yogis etching their name on the ceiling at our beautiful Radisson hotel rooms and then getting the noose out, kick the chair over and your done. Namaste...
Friday, May 25, 2012
Yesterday we had a lecture by Jon Burras about Facia. I hope I never hear the word Facia ever again. It was kind of interesting, this Fascia stuff but there is something about that word that bugs me. Not sure what. In any event, fascia is in our body. It is the connective tissue surrounding all our muscles, nerves, organs... just about everthing in the body. What he was trying to say is that Fascia is the glue that holds our bodies together and keeps us upright. (not the bones) Also that the Fascia acts as a superhighway for our energy lines. If the Fascia is dead or damaged you get a blockage in your energy in that area. Jon's lecture was interesting but he made some medical claims that I thought were pretty unsubstantiated. I don't think that's very cool. Not with a group like this, who trust people are telling them the truth. Today he is speaking on Chakras. I think this is more in his wheelhouse and experience. I have a feeling the lecture will be very enlightening. Get back to ya on that. So, Training is plugging along. It's FRIDAY. Everyone is happy. Three weeks left. That makes me sad to think about. I love the yoga bubble we are all in. Imagine going somewhere, surrounded by likeminded people who you can live with, eat with, learn with, grow with.... As a adult, I know that this is very unique and special. I was given a couple quotes from someone here at TT who's life has changed quite substantially before coming and is continuing to change. It's a beautiful process to watch. Here they are. "Somewhere out there beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing there is a field - I will meet you there" and also "Not knowing when the dawn will come, I open every door" and of course this last quote I love so much. (see below)
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
Week Six. We were told that week six is the hell week. I'm not sure if it is, but I'm pissed off anyway. I'm so done with all the posture clinics. I think Bikram has been sick or something so still no lectures, just posture clinic. Today I was kind of negative. When I got up to deliever my posture they (the four senior teachers on the panel) asked what was my "homework" or what am I working on. I just turned and said, "at this point, I'm not really sure, speed up, slow down, smile, don't smile, move, don't more, turn over and roll around???...." (we get feedback from a million people) and then I just said "I'm just pretty much done with all these posture clinics. I know I'm going to teach and do a good job, but I'm done with this." So then, there was a hush that kind of went over the room. I kept staring at the teachers and they stared back. I'm pretty good at insubordination. Lots of practice in the past. Anyway, did the posture with one of my best dialoge delieveries but no energy or personality. I think at this point, I have sweated out all my personality in the Hot Room. It's gone. So, now I have 5 minutes to get my shit together and get downstairs for the second yoga class of the day. After that I think Bikram is going to keep us up until 3AM. Perfect.
Sunday, May 20, 2012
Last week was one big Sanskrit nightmare. We had double posture clinics nearly everyday. People are stressed. I'm stessed. But still surviving, still laughing, still smiling. The thing is that everyone HERE knows the postures and the diagloge so you feel extra anxiety but the reality is that when we all go back to our home studios and start teaching, NOBODY will know and nobody will judge. We are all our own worst critic here. Someone said to me that teaching is going to be the easy bit but finding out why we are here, under the pressure we are is the hard part. As far as I'm concerned, I'm surrounded by the most beautiful pleople inside and out here at Teacher Training. These are the people who have looked inward and have asked the question WHY? What is it about this yoga that at makes me feel the way I do and want to share it with other people. What is it in yourself that you are trying to bring out to the surface. I can tell you that I have never had a experience like this before. Not ever. and its amazing. I have included a poem called "The Invitation". Please read it when you have a quiet moment to yourself with out distractions and then just be still with your thoughts after. Enjoy. It doesn't interest me what you do for a living I want to know what you ache for and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing. It doesn't interest me how old you are I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love for your dreams for the adventure of being alive. It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon... I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shrivelled and closed from fear of further pain. I want to know if you can sit with pain mine or your own without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it. I want to know if you can be with joy mine or your own if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful be realistic to remember the limitations of being human. It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself. If you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul. If you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy. I want to know if you can see Beauty even when it is not pretty every day. And if you can source your own life from its presence. I want to know if you can live with failure yours and mine and still stand on the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, "Yes." It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up after a night of grief and despair weary and bruised to the bone and do what needs to be done to feed the children. It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back. It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you from the inside when all else falls away. I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.
Sunday, May 13, 2012
For the last two weeks we have had the pleasure of learning Anatomy and Physiology by guest speaker Dr. Jim Preddy, DO. He is a ER doc from Las Vegas. So you can image all the destruction that comes into his office daily. And yes, he had pictures of a lot of it. (more later on that) I have worked in the medical field in a sales capacity for 10 years. I know physicians and I really have enjoyed studing their behaviors. Great people, for the most part. So, having a background speaking with docs, I was suprised to have such a intelligent, yet funny, yet self depricating, yet commonsenseical (is that a word?), yet quick witted physician lecture. The world needs more people like Dr. Jim Preddy in it. He came to lecture, on his vacation for two weeks. I'm sure he wasn't paid for his time. He also adjusted (he's a chiropracter, massage tech, and ex cheerleader as well) about 400 yogis for free as well. He's a yogi himself. His body has undergone many changes since he started Bikram Yoga. I think he has lost about 50 plus pounds? He's makes sense of Bikram yoga from a medical commonsense perpective while making fun of himself the whole way. Sometimes you meet people who have a immediate influence on you. You want to become a better person. You can see their evolution and you look for it more in yourself. That's Dr. Preddy. As for his gruesome slideshows, I liked the nail through the brain xray, feet/legs turning into scales, skin on the scalp ripped off with bone expose, foot turning unnatural way due to being broke at the botton ankle (they had to put the foot back on basically), but I'll never forget the picture of the man with the worst case of Chlamydia who had the huge abcess with puss ozing out and his penis about to fall off. Classic!
Friday, May 11, 2012
I was waiting for things here at TT to slow a bit before I checked back in. Well, I think that was dilutional thinking so here I am at 630AM writing. I want to thank everyone out there for thinking about me as I go through the processes here. Believe it or not, I can feel it. I really can. Yesterday's evening class we had one of my favorite teachers, Jim from San Diego. He said at the beginning of class, "my brain, your body". What he meant is shared energy, synergy. It was a hard class (they have been slowly turning up the heat here) and I was struggling. When you start to lose steam early, particularly with this type of yoga, it can make you worried because its so physically demanding. Also, I know that my body will start going numb and other lovely side effects kick in. Anyway about 60 minutes through the class I remembered what Jim said. This guy Jim, I swear used to be a bad ass Jedi Master in another life, he has energy times 1000. When I finally let go and was ready to give up from exhaustion, I did what Jim said. I let him think for me and just followed his direction carefully and completely. I had a surge of energy that can't be ignored and finished the class strong. Mentally that was a breakthrough for me last night. Jim has a saying "hidden force, latent energy". We are all capable of so much more. More peace, more determination, more love, more understanding, more happiness, more more more. I was very happy after class and felt great. Our bodies are a amazing thing. Leaning to LOVE it all here at TT.
Friday, May 4, 2012
TGIF. Is been a busy week for a yogini. Who knew being a yogi would be so demanding. So happy that I have 400 plus more happy smiling yogis to help me along. So that was kind of the theme of the week. Posture clinic started here. So imagine having to get up infront of 45 strangers and recite a yoga dialogue that really doesnt roll off the tongue yet. Kind of nerve racking. Bikram yoga seems to attract a lot if type A personalities. So that kind of ups the antsy a bit when learning and performing. I had some up and downs (rehearsing dialogue is by far the most challenging aspect so far) but I have been learning to not beat myself up over it. That doesn't benefit me at all. So happy it's FRIDAY! We still Have full day, ( up till 1130pm) but Saturday we only have ONE yoga class. It seems do easy now, slam dunk! So we had a great teacher from Huntington beach today teach our 8 AM class. She gave us some advise. Pickles. Pickles are one of the BEST foods for yogis. Replenish all the sodium and other minerals we sweat out. Bon appetite.
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
Yes my last entry was a little bit of a SOS. But I'm still here, gotta do the work. Suck it up baby. The pace here at TT has quickened. They are implementing new features and then will last minute change the game. Just to make sure we don't get too comfortable. (or to just f$ck with us) Today my breakfast/lunch was two cans of sardines and one green apple. Are you feeling me now? This is nuts. Bikram was here last night and had a optional movie night after our classes ended at 1130pm. I hung out until 130am. I was pretty proud of that effort. I heard that people stayed until 7am!! Yep 7am! We are peeling the onion here. Someone said this experience is more demanding than basic army boot camp and LONGER! I think I deserve some props!!
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
Thursday, April 26, 2012
I've heard the rumors and was warned ahead of time that during class you may find that there is a sneaky little phantom in the hot room. She will appear out of thin air, right in back of your yoga mat, and say in the most sweet voice "You are doing this all wrong!!!!". You look back and see a svelt woman in a super sexy black one piece costume. Yes, it's EMMY CLEAVE!!!! Your breath quickens, muscles contract, eyes narrow.. You have been caught slacking by the infamous Emmy! Bikrams most senior teacher. Emmy taught our morning yoga class today. It was wonderful. Emmy is precise. Ask me why? (inside yoga bubble phrase) she is precise about the postures because YOGA IS NOT ABOUT THE POSTURE IT'S ABOUT THE BODY. This point has been reiterated over and over again here at TT. Yoga is Union between body, mind and spirit. In yoga, a person reaches the mind by using the body. Yoga asanas are designed to align body to reach the mind and then the spirit . Right Emmy?
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
We are starting to fall into a rhythm here at TT. Wake up, 8AM sign in, 8:30AM YOGA. 10 - 12PM eat/study/sleep. 12PM Sign in. 12:30 - 4PM lecture. 4:30 Sign in. 5PM Yoga 9PM sign in. 9:30 - 2AM Lecture/Movie/Clinic. The days go by fast. The nights, particularly after 9:30PM, go slooooowwwww. BUT last night we had a pretty darn good Bollywood flick. I would recommend it and it's available in English. It was Khabi Khushi - Khabi Gham. And it's all about family dynamics. (plus a lot of jerky dancing in leather outfits) The dancing is really funny. Who knew the Indian people had those moves? Dang. Lack of sleep is making some (ok me) feel more emotional. Our AM yoga teacher today said, "you can't be in a bad mood this early in the game". It's only Wed. of week two. Suck it up. I'm a mother and I usually get my PJ's on with my kids (3 and 7) back at home at 8:30PM so this is really hard. I nearly fell out of my chair on the ground last night asleep. Maybe if I fall and hit my head they will let me go sleep? My yoga practice, on the other hand, is rocking! I'm definitly improving every class. It feels great and makes me happy. Still loving everything... keep me in mind and send me good vibes!!!
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Last night was another Bollywood fun filled evening. First "Boss" (as Bikram is referred to) told us the story of Mahabarata which lasted about two hours, THEN we watched the Bollywood movie (on the same subject) which was another three hours. So, in total, we had five hours lesson on Mahabarata. It's a sacred Story of a king from India. Please don't ask me anything else, I have no idea. BUT I do know that a woman was drowning her baby every 5 seconds. (yes we watched a obviously plastic baby drown in the river over and over again). lots of bubbles??? Anyway, got to bed a bit after 2AM. I thought Bikram LIKED us, why did he do that? It was brutal. I woke up this morning and just kept asking my Assie roommate. WHY? WHY? WHY? We had a good laugh then I nearly smacked her on the face with my foot when I asked her to check out my "undercarriage" to make sure my yoga shorts covered up all the parts. Things are getting punchy!!
Sunday, April 22, 2012
First week down. I hate to say it, because I know people will think I'm (more) crazy, but I LOVE IT HERE!!! Being able to learn directly from Bikram himself has been amazing. I know that this is where I'm suppose to be. I also love practicing with 450 other yogis. It's a energy level I've never felt before during my individual practice back in Boise. You can feel more directly how connected we all are in the yoga room. Another aspect that I'm enjoying about this teacher training is that we have the unique experience of having the BEST Bikram Yoga teachers from around the world come in to teach our class. One man, Ulyssis, from Mexico was just beautiful. So graceful and inspirational. I gave him a HUGE hug after class, who cares about all the sweat!
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Bikram is fan of the big screen. He loves his movies and last night he had us watch one of his favorite movies from Bollywood, Kahoo Naa... Pyaar Hai I think it was four hour total after a full day of two yoga classes and lecture. I fell asleep at least five times and woke up to, I swear, the same scene over and over again. It's a love story about heartbreak and allowing yourself to find love again. Bollywood loves their music and dancing! It's hilarious. So if you find that you have some extra time, watch Kahoo Naa.. Pyaar Hai. Bikram would be happy!
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Last night was the first of the late nights. We were dismissed at midnight, after a full day of lecture and two yoga classes. It was the first day of Half Moon pose clinic which means that each student must stand up on the podium infront of Bikram (there is about 5 feet between you and Bikram) and deliever the Half Moon dialoge. He does this so that he can assess your per sonality, what your all about, what are your weaknesses/strengths, what you look like, what you sound like.... He uses your perfomance as teaching tool for the rest of the class. It was very effective. Feedback for the group was immediate but if you were the one (and there were many) he is telling the rest of the class to not be like, a little embarrasing as well. I'm happy to say that I volunteered on the first day and he had no corrections for me. Said I did "very good job". We laughed about Idaho potatos and he said that Boise is about as big as his backyard in Bombay. Being in front of Bikram was an honor. I could feel the love. He says cutting remarks but it's just his way. He has so much to share. I just love it here with him.
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Bikrams first lecture yesterday was inspiring and filled with his "Bikramisms". Little pearls of wisdom from the man himself. Here's a couple I quickly wrote down. "product in BHY is LIFE, the product everyone wants" "you don't follow the world, the world will follow you" "junk body, screw loose brain, lost soul" And here's a good one. Just in case we weren't worried already "Welcome to Bikram Disneyland haunted house. No windows and No doors" Have a great day. Time for 830 am yoga. Namaste.
Monday, April 16, 2012
Today was a great day. Bikram made his first appearance. He spoke to us in the lecture hall for one hour. He arrived looking hip in a black V neck tee shirt with bedazzled neckline, black pants and black leather biker jacket. You could have heard a pin drop, everyone just stared in amazement. Bikram has a presence and aura about him that immediately captivates. He was very grateful to us to put ourselves first and come to TT. Self realization, cosmic consciousness, mind/body connection were points he spoke on. We also took out very first yoga class today from Bikram in the ballroom. It was FANTASTIC!
Theres 424 awesome yogis from 33 different countries registered and present. We had the hotel services overview, which spent a lot of time talking about how there are no longer bed bugs in our rooms, followed by lectures by Emmy Cleaves and other misc Bikram staff. Best advise was to LISTEN, be present and allow yourself to take in the next 9 weeks. They keep talking out "trusting the process". ThIs is the 39th Bikram TT and they have refined TT down to only the Essentials. Nothing less and nothing more. So happy to be here !!!
Friday, April 13, 2012
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Just arrived to my younger brothers home in Agoura Hills and passed this beautiful succulent on the way to his front door. About a 40 min drive to downtown LA. Better yet just a quick drive on Kanan to Malibu. My favorite place ever! Happy to report that we made it safe and sound. Without incident and on only two full tanks of gas. (Prius) I think it's so funny to cruise around SoCal with my Idaho plates on. I can already feel the other drivers rolling their eyes.
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Peppermill in Reno was delightful. Loves the fitness center and steam room! Mom won $400.00 on penny slots. Left Reno around 11 AM, followed by snow flurries over Tahoe area, followed by rain showers on HWY 99. But we found a cute little parisan place in Sacramento, CA for lunch and then ran around the waterfront in Oldtown. Holly loved chasing the birds. Now, I think we are somewhere near Modesto, CA at a Best Western?? Next stop Los Angeles.
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Hit the road at 9 am this morning from Boise, Idaho. With my awesome 66 year young mother and 3 year old daughter Holly. Made it to Reno, Nevada without any issues. Love the Prius!!
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
"sow a thought, reap a habit. Sow a habit, reap a character. Sow a character, reap a destiny." I recently read this quote from a article out of Yoga Journal, March 2012. The article was talking about karma. This particular quote really resonated with me as I prepare to leave for Bikram Yoga Teacher Training. I thank Jamie Mitchell, owner of Boise Bikram, for her profound advise on being aware of our thoughts. It's where everything starts, I suppose. Both for good or not so good. I also want to thank Nicole Vickerman, one of our awesome BHY instructors, for telling me to "set my intention and let it lead me.". She doesnt know this, but I did from that moment and the doors leading me to teacher training started opening. I would also like to thank Kacie McEgan, BHY Silver Lake, LA, for her beautiful honesty and encouragement to follow my dream. Lastly to my husband, JT, thank you for "being cool" with sending your wife off to yoga camp. Trust me, I really will come back ;) I'll return to the blog when I hit the road April 10th..... Stay Tuned..